We failed

We fell for each other almost instantaneously. It was too quick. We were never friends. We never wanted to know each other. We let our eyes and hormones take control. We comfortably overlooked the red flags.

We romanticized the idea of love at first sight.

We failed.

I didn’t open up to you. I never told you what I liked and what I loathed. I just withheld my heart’s desires. I wanted to appear nice, polite, and accommodating.

I should have hurt you with the truth rather than making you bleed later. I am sorry.

We failed.

We failed to realize that we are fallible and prone to mistakes. I thought you were a superwoman and you believed that I was a god-like.

So when the tiniest of slide came up, we could not bear the shock. What?? Ben, you could lie? What? I thought you could never be dishonest!

We failed.

Oh! I should have let you live your life. I wanted me to be the only tune of your life. I did not value my friends. Or family. “You are all I need,” I declared as you collapsed on me romantically.

We eventually forgot our passion, goals, and desires-small and big. When was the last time I admired your dance? When was the last time you appreciated my physique?

We failed.

We overlooked crucial issues. I knew you smoked. I knew you partied harder than you should have. I knew you skipped sleep-hours. I ignored it because I thought that was love.

You never reprimanded me when I got laid. You never even frowned when I spent money foolishly. That was what love does, you thought.

We failed.

We never communicated. We argued, never spoke. We heard, never listened. When I wanted to say “I need some time alone,” I said “I have some work to do. Can we speak tomorrow?”

We never had a healthy conversation for more than a few minutes. We were quick to judge and pass blames.

Hell, we wanted to win every argument. We won the argument, but lost us.

We failed.

We were never compatible. You are a good person. You are kind. You are passionate. You love me. I know it.

But we are good in our own ways. We were never meant to be together. We should have known this earlier. We should have observed the red flags.

We failed.

We were bent on revenge and grudges. We should have tried forgiving. You didn’t have to forgive at all times. I could have played my part.

We failed.

We fell in love just because we wanted to be in love. We were in love with the idea of being in love. We never bonded. Or blended. Or intertwined with passion. We just overlapped.

We failed.

We failed because we were never a team. We never put efforts. We never invested in love. We let these issues grow. Steadily yet imperceptibly.

We thought that love was all rainbows, fairies, and bunny kisses. We failed to see the storm lurking behind.

Finally every misstep we took strangled us, suffocating the beautifully crafted relationship to death.

We killed the very baby we raised with love and passion. It died in the very hands that carved it.

Don’t blame yourself, honey.

You did not fail. Neither did I. We failed.

Let us do the kindest thing possible: move on and never look back.

I love you.

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