The wishes of a heart that never healed

Until today,
I found myself still struggling
To remind my own self that i am on my own.
Your name that used to be my source of strength,
No longer works today.

Every soundtrack that reminds me of you,
Were repeated. Again, and again.
Just to remind me of the pain
That never actually healed.
I just get used to live with it.

I cant deny, and i wont.
I do regret cutting off the rope.
I do regret pushing you away
Telling you to never text me again.
And today, i long for it.

Listening to your voice,
Laughing with you,
Telling you my stupid pick up lines,
Become my wishes,
While blowing my birthday candles,
While looking at the stars,
While praying to Jesus,
And while writing this piece of shit.

A woman whose mind still wander, heart still bleeding, and soul were full of bruises
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