Stupid Book Analogy

I was furiously flipping the pages
looking for any sign of hope
hoping that there will be an alternate ending
or something that I missed that could have changed everything
I refused to believe that our lives are pre-determined
that some higher power has written it all down for us
how we’d meet someone who became our whole world
only to have them yanked out of our lives
as painful and as horrid as it could be

we will feel lost like never before
no pain could measure up to losing someone
or missing someone who is alive
but is no longer present in your life
why would anyone accept that to be their ‘fate’?

No, I refuse to think that life is a book
and that people we meet are chapters
go to hell with your analogy and my stupid attempt to use it at the beginning of this piece
Fuck all of that, I deserve more than this
you deserve more than this

I want it, I want to be happy
even if I can’t find hope waiting for me as the sun rises from the east
even if the waves crashing the shore did not bring along the love I have lost
even when there are rainbows after a heavy rain
I don’t care for all these
I want to be happy

In other words, I want you

– c.n

not your miracle, just a girl http://www.hocusbogus.tumblr.com
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2 thoughts on “Stupid Book Analogy

  1. Somehow I feel like I’m a character stuck at the last page of this book, still refusing to believe that everything played out the way it did. and I wonder, if this is all there is to the story.

    In the end, I depend on the book analogy again and again. Still, fuck the book analogy tho πŸ™

    1. tbh, that’s how I often felt too. Maybe that’s why I hate it so much because I am in denial that everything IS written and I couldn’t possibly change it. Oh well, what else can we do if not write about it. πŸ™

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