I didn’t know it back then.

That break ups caused a different kind of sadness.

Not the same kind of sadness

Where your siblings ate your last cookies,

Or when your crush had a girlfriend,

Or even when your parents punished you for

Your brother’s wrongdoing.


If I knew the pain and weight of sadness

That comes with breaking up,

I would never do it.

I would have just held it in.

I would just tolerate it.

After all, aint that the reason why

We love in the first place?


And now I wonder,

If we could get back together,

If this heartbreak doesn’t hurt just me,

But you too,

Can we healed and mend whatever that was broken

With our love for each other?


I cant help but reminiscing what we gone through,

On the days where I suddenly missed us,

On the days where I suddenly caught glimpse of your gift to me,

The impulse to break the last drawer sitting below my closet,

Go stronger and I cant help to go through it.

Those letters,

Diaries and thousands of words scribbled,

I locked it away, safely,

So no one will ever knew how I felt.

About you.

And about us too.



smol. living.
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