How the hell do you tell someone that you have no desire to live? How to say that without having them feel shit in return? Listen here, whoever you are. Sympathy. i do not need pity. is there anyone who would understand? here, i am telling you. i do not want to live. i have […]

God Bless

I was born begging for God’s mercy, fear and love for all that is Holy, each day began praising Thee, and each day ends praying for He.   As I mature, fear grew into hatred, as men in tunics demand me to be wed, a child barely grown, yet groped and drowned by guilt.   […]


I asked you.. did you give up on us, on our friendship? you said you didn’t. But you were a little a quieter lately. No more jokes no more calls no more fun anymore. I told you again and again, i want us to be happy, to have a normal conversation with anyone. you said […]

untuk LOL

Whenever i think that you guys will be away from me, i’m upset and teared up a lil bit. Being away from you means i’m losing of one of my comfort, safest place. In this unfriendly world, where everyone put a mountain height expectation on me, you guys basically have none. You expect nothing from […]

runaway moon

let me live in a skyless utopia, promise I’ll never wonder why the moon is quiet again; my friend, a painter, knows the crevices of stars like the back of her hand, still, knows no meaning of silence   which is to say I’ve wandered in search of the moon- glimpses of him in people […]

My happy vision

First dream We were always surrounded by people And we will run to each other whenever we are alone And we crave more time together We held hands, we joke around The smile we had was genuine It was a pure happiness I wish we were never apart   Second dream I sneak into your […]

sad short story

I was 10 when my teacher asked us to write a short story about our best friend. I looked at mine and smiled. I then wrote everything I knew about him. Once we’re done the teacher asked for volunteers to read our story out loud. My best friend went first. It was not about me. […]

kamu yang tak pasti

Masa lalu tidak boleh diubah. Titik. ‘Kalau’ sepatutnya tidak perlu digunakan untuk hal-hal yang sudah berlalu kerana ia membuang waktu dan memuruk kesal. ‘Kalau’ adahal kebarangkalian yang seharusnya dihidupkan maka gunakan ia sebaiknya untuk menciptakan keadaan yang lebih baik. ‘Kalau’ seharusnya menjadi cerminan usaha bukan kata-kata kesal percuma. Dalam kehidupan yang tidak boleh diputar saat […]

New Space

I am always longing for a fresh new start because honestly everything I do is never enough and how I wish I was good enough but I never will be. And at this point I’m not sure whether adulting is hard or being me is hard. I always found myself chasing for a new feeling […]


If I could go back on that day, I would have warn myself. Never trust others easily. People comes in every forms, some are beautiful, and some aren’t. It was just my luck that I met someone which is not even pretty but a devil in disguise. I would describe myself as a person who […]

A little of this and that

a compilation of poetry i wrote; 1.Lips These tears won’t stop flowing. The lips won’t stop smiling ‘till it hurts. Hands grasp tightly on a bouquet of flower, A question sparks. The heart asks quietly; feeling scared. Scared of ruining the cheerful atmosphere, Do you remember how painful you handle the pain? And how much […]

biskut marie

Hanis meletak kembali potongan kek batik yang baru segigit dimakan. Air mukanya tampak kecewa. “Tak sedap jugak?” Najua merenungnya tak percaya. Sesuap kek batik laju memasuki mulutnya.“Tak sama.” Hanis mencebik dengan wajah kelat. Mocha ais dikacau perlahan sebelum disedut melepasi kerongkong. Rasa nyaman apabila rasa manis kek batik dapat dibilas dengan kelat kopi mocha. Amaranth- […]

Tuhan, kenapa Engkau ciptakan aku?

14 tahun hidup atas dunia, aku pernah tanya Tuhan, kenapa Dia cipta aku. Aku pernah marah pada Tuhan, hidup aku waktu tu penuh liku. Emosi aku tidak stabil. Aku pernah rasa Tuhan marah aku. Tuhan benci aku. Walaupun aku ambil gunting dan cederakan diri, tumbuk dinding di kanan dan kiri, aku masih teruskan hidup, berbekalkan […]

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