Just a bestfriend

Dear you,

Thanks for always having my back

Thanks for always being there for me

Thanks for always asking my whereabouts

 

Dear you,

Thanks for listening to my problems

Thanks for responding me like how I want to be responded

Thanks for the attention given

Thanks for the late night long hours of phone calls

 

Dear you,

Thanks for listening to all my ambitious dreams

Thanks for making me feel like I’m in love

Thanks for making me feel like it is reciprocated.

 

But I do know,

Deep down,

I am just a friend to you.

A bestfriend.

 

But the things you do,

Made me think otherwise..

I am also reminded of the statement that you told my bestfriend,

“me and her? Never” “if she likes me, ask her to stop”

 

you really think I’m different don’t you?

Although I tend to show you how emotionless I am,

I am really weak inside…

When my friends told you,

Shes just a girl, she might fall for you,

And your reply was ‘ she’s —, I believe she wont’

 

I don’t know if I should be proud.. or sad?

The fact that you think I’m that strong,

Or to think the fact that you really see me as…

A friend. and nothing more.

 

I wish I feel the same too.

But, if you were just a friend,

I wouldn’t feel so excited getting a notification from you,

I wouldn’t sleep so late just to talk to you,

I wouldn’t miss your voice, the smell of your perfume and your presence,

And I definitely wont feel so down now

thinking that you only see me as a friend and nothing more.

 

The world never warned or teach me that,

A guy who grabs your hand when you are cold,

Cheers for you when you play sports,

Gets jealous when you talk to a guy,

Talks to you for hours,

Let you put your legs on his when you are cold,

Wears the perfume that you love when he sees you,

Waits for you till you fall asleep when you takut hantu,

Talks about going on trips together,

Share about his family with you,

Share everything with you…

The world never told me that… someone like that..

can just see me as a bestfriend.

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