I finally have the courage to post.
I went to work like always, I had a weird feeling. I told my friend that I’m coming home late that day. I came to work and get most of my tasks done.
At 12.48pm, my phone rang and it was my brother :
”Can you leave the office? Sekarang.”
”Mama, dia kritikal now.”
”Okay I leave now”
I packed everything and started walking to the LRT,
At 12.58pm, my heart emptied by a gush of wind. I looked at my phone and saw my aunt posted “Inannillah-“ at the family group chat.
”Abang, mama dah takde ke?”
I cried the whole way to the hospital, in the train, in the cab. When I reached there, I was in a denial. I didn’t want to look what was there under the covers. I screamed in the room, I cried and…. I went out of the room and just sat by the hallway.
I couldn’t cry anymore, I just stared into the empty space, I didn’t think, I was just confused with the condition I was in.
I get to bathe her for the last time, I get to see her for the last time.
Ma, thank you.