a sad dream of you

i had a dream the other day. and like every other day i dreamt of you. just like every other dream, they hurt. this one, it broke me. 

i remember every aching pain there is in that particular dream, because i lost you.

you died. 

you died.

you died in my dreams. 

and there’s life after that i won’t ever be strong enough to face it. 

you left for good, and it pains in my heart knowing i will never get to look at you again. 

it pains because i never get to say my last words.

it pains because it’s knowing i could never ever hear your voice again. 

it pains because i felt like we had unfinished business.

you’re gone and it broke me, because i know nothing will ever be the same. 

when i woke up the next day, i woke up crying. 

because the pain remains. 

i was scared, was petrified of never getting to say my last words to you.

i was scared of not letting out what i really feel for the last time. 

i was scared for myself thinking i’ve done you wrong.

i was scared because i still love you. 

so i wanted to text you. after so long that we never did. 

i wanted to know if you’re alright, i wanted to know why we actually broke it off, i wanted to know if you’ve lied, i wanted to know why we end up so badly like this that we couldn’t even remain friends as we used to. 

i wanted you to know i really cared for you. 

i wanted to tell you every single thing over a phone call. 

for a closure.

but i never did it. 

i wasn’t strong enough to say things i shouldn’t, and my hands are tied. 

every single dream of you was showing you’ve met someone new, and this is a dream where i’ve lost you.

i tried to acting like nothing happen but i know this one will leave me scarred so i buried it deep.

then i did try to act it at ease. 

so i did the same to you as i did to all my guy friends. 

they would bid me thank you, 

though i don’t think you even read. 

that was it, my blind spot. 

i was hit by a racing car to know where i stand in your life. 

i became a complete stranger, and you’re missing someone new when i’m missing you. 

in my dreams, i lost you because you died. and i remember it very well that it broke me. 

and when i wake up, the pain is still there, 

knowing i’ve lost you still in another way. 

had a heart lined with cracks but i chose art to fill it.
Posts created 20

Leave a Reply

Related Posts

Begin typing your search term above and press enter to search. Press ESC to cancel.

Back To Top
%d bloggers like this: